Stupid is as Stupid Does....

I always liked that line from Forrest Gump, but honestly I was not 100% sure I could put its meaning into different words. Kind of like the supreme court in discussing the definition of pornography, it is hard to define, but they know it when they see it. I think we know " stupid is as stupid does" when we see it and rep Todd Akin has put it on full display.

A declaration of a politician's statement as one the dumbest of all time is a big claim, a very steep mountain to climb. Joe Biden and his boss have given us some top ten material in recent months, but even their ridiculously moronic statements like the "private sector is doing fine, we gonna put y'all in chains, and you didn't build that" pale in comparison to the idiocy of Todd Akin stating that women's body can naturally fend off pregnancy in a legitimate rape. Wow! That sets a new bar for stupidity, which is a tall, tall order given the competition. I don't even want to get into what he means by legitimate rape, but let's just say this comment sets a new low in modern political discourse.

Where Akin doubles down on his stupidity, where he really becomes " stupid is as stupid does" incarnate, is his decision to stay in the race for the Missouri senate seat. Really? After that comment which has guaranteed a landslide win for his opponent, the inept and vulnerable Claire McCaskill. But no, Akin has declared that he is "not a quitter". Really? Not a quitter? How about an ego maniacal moron? Akin is going to stay in a race that he has zero chance to win so he can show us all he is not a quitter, just dumb. He will be a drag on the national ticket, although the chances that the democrats overplay this hand is high and getting higher, but not to worry, Todd Akin is no quitter.

I heard a recent interview with Akin where he went into his stump speech about why he is a better choice for Missouri and how his conservative value best represent the values of Missouri residents. Blah, blah, blah. It was pathetic, What's worse is that Akin is oblivious to the reality that no one cares about his stump speech any more. His stump speech, his values, his promises for conservative leadership, none of this matters. His opponent's record doesn't matter any more. All that matters in the outcome of this election is the incredibly stupid statement he made and how rep Akin cannot find the courage to exist the race.

Akin represents all that is bad with our politics. Politics is not about we the citizens. No, politics unfortunately is about the egos and the blind unbridled aspirations of the individual candidates. Politics is about the money the flows to support the inflated and self congratulating individuals who occupy our governments. 

If candidate Akin is too obtuse or too blind to see the massive writing on the wall, then he deserves to lose. In the end the citizens of Missouri lose because they will be stuck with Claire McCaskill for another six years....and we all lose because as Akin has shown, stupid is as stupid does, and we know this when we see it. Well done Todd. Good luck with that race of yours. You should expect Senator McCaskill to send you a big country ham and a nice bottle of wine for Christmas this year, just to say "thanks". The rest of the nation wishes you a lump of coal, for a myriad of reasons.

I Just Want a Chicken Sammich

I fly to Boston 6-8 times a year on business. Jet Blue has the best service between Richmond and Boston. Direct flights, new airplanes, personal in-flight TV's, and very good prices.Jet Blue is my first choice when I fly to Boston.

It is my bet that Jet Blue CEO David Barger is a pretty liberal guy. My bet is that he and I would disagree on many issues. It is a fact that Jet Blue sponsored a convention held by the radical fringe web site "The Daily Kos". I disagree with a great deal of the garbage posted on The Daily Kos. Any idea how much this has impacted my willingness to fly Jet Blue? If you answered "none" please move to the head of the class.

Now here comes Dan Cathy, the president of Chick-Fil-A. I don't know a whole lot about Dan. I know that I love his company's product. I don't agree with his statement that he believes in a "bibilical interpration of marriage", but I also don't have an idealogical litmus test for the leadership of businesses I patronize. I find it sad and pathetic that nitwits like Thomas Menino, the mayor of Boston or Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel want to keep Chick-Fil-A out of their cities because they don't like the company president's definition of marriage. Really? Do they check the politcal philosophies of all the business owners in their cities? Are catholic-owned businesses who are adamently pro-life as unwelcome as Chick-Fil-A in Boston? When the mayorship turns over do we review what businesses can and which ones cannot stay in Chicago based on their views on tax policy? When did politcal alignment with state and local government leadership become a prerequisite to doing business in a locality? I wonder if folks who don't have a job in Boston and Chicago care about Dan Cathy's view's on marriage?

It is a little annoying to me when folks like Thomas Menino and Rahm Emanuel talk about protecting the freedoms and rights of "the people" when in reality, they only mean the the people with whom they agree politcally. If they don't want to eat Chick-Fil-A sandwiches because they don't like the politics of the company executives, have at it (As a big fan of the Chick-Fil-A sandwich, I can tell you they are on the losing end of that bargain) but they have no standing to keep Chick-Fil-A from opening businesses in their cities.What are they afraid of, it's just a chicken sammich? How can they possibly defend such a position with any modicum of credibility? Chick-Fil-A has a track record of stewardship and is operating with the bounds of the law. However they are not going to be allowed to operate in Boston or Chicago because of Dan Cathy's definition of marriage? Have we really stooped to this level of silliness?

I am going to fly Jet Blue and I will carry on an order of Chick-Fil-A chicken minnies to have on the way. Politics is already too intrusive on my life. I don't need it interfering with my decision to fly an airline that provides great service at a great price and chicken sandwiches that are more than delicious. If Thomas Menino and Rahm Emanuel would get off their high horses for a minute, they would see the folly of their positions.

Everyone Gets a Scooter

Have you seen the commercial on TV for The Scooter Store? I hate that ad more than any commercial on TV....ever. The pitch from The Scooter Store is that if you want a scooter or power chair, you can get one at "little or no cost to you". However, these products are not free, in fact they are pretty darned expensive. So the unspoken truth behind these hideous advertisements is that you can have an expensive product paid for mostly or fully by someone else.

 Now we are seeing ads from our government for "free" health services. Mammograms, bone density checks, adolescent counseling, etc all available at no cost thanks to the new healthcare law. Really? Free services? I must have missed the part of Obamacare where healthcare providers don't charge for their services. Maybe I overlooked where GE was providing its MRI equipment free to hospitals and clinics across America. These things aren't free. Thanks to Obamcare, they will be paid for involuntarily by someone else.

 I have also noticed that social welfare programs like food stamps are being advertised as "benefits", like they are something we should all hope to get from our employers next year. Let's all make sure we take advantage of the government handouts...oops, I mean benefits, because they are "free".

 Food stamps are benefits? Scooters are free to anyone who needs them? It's okay for someone else to pay for my health services? What is wrong with us that this is okay and an expected?!? Have we become so morally bankrupt, so greedy, and frankly so lazy that we only want what we want as long as someone else pays for it? We have evolved past subsistence farming. We have a specialized economic model where people freely buy goods and service from each other in a free exchange. Well, we had that model, until goverment giveaway programs made it possible for some clown on TV to offer free scooters. I guess my only question is which clown is worse, the one on TV giving away scooters that those who pay taxes have to buy or the clown in the White House giving away health care that is free to some, but not to most.

I never thought I would say this, but we are broken as a country and as a people when this is okay. The only silver lining I see is that as a kid I always wanted a scooter and never got one. I guess someday, I will get my scooter, no matter how much it costs us all.

A Dad For All Seasons

My dad had 3 boys. Now he has 3 grown sons and 6 grandchildren. His job has evolved over time, but I am not sure it is ever done, which is a blessing for all of us.


When we were little, dad’s job was to lay the foundations of right and wrong, shape raw stone, do the heavy lifting of keeping 3 energetic boys in line. His job wasn’t easy. At least we didn’t make it easy for him a lot of the time. While the winds have time have smoothed many of the sharp edges of the missteps of our childhood, I know there were times when dad had to wonder what in the world was wrong with his boys who regularly took bone-headed behavior to new levels of absurdity. I vividly recall my dad with his head in his hands, asking me questions, trying to understand why I had thrown a giant rock through a window he had just replaced. We had broken the window 3 times playing baseball over the summer. The answer was, he had replaced the window with “unbreakable glass”. I was about 8 years old at the time, and my neighborhood friends did not believe there was such a thing as unbreakable glass. In order to prove my claim, I threw a rock as hard as I could at the window from point blank range. To my horror, it exploded into a million pieces once again filling my mom's washing machine with shards of glass…marking what was now the fourth time I had smashed that window. I still recall the pained questions from my dad…”you threw what at the window?!?” “What did you think would happen when you threw a rock at the window?!?”

My dad was and remains the consummate person of logic, reason, and analysis. Events like the window smashing were pretty regular occurrences at my house. Given his penchant for logic and reason, dad had to be the most puzzled and perplexed father on the planet trying to understand the actions of his boys. Sometimes it was me fielding his angst-ridden and befuddled questions; sometimes it was one of my 2 brothers having to explain their ludicrous behavior. Justifiably, dad had to frequently wonder if his sons would ever be able to live on their own. As we got older our missteps got bigger and more expensive, but they kept coming. We broke lamps and furniture playing football and baseball in the house. When we could drive we all got speeding tickets and wrecked cars.

When we were little dad worked hard on the “right and wrong” foundation. As we got older, he focused more on the “good judgment” foundation…giving us just enough rope to hang ourselves, which we usually did. Two days after an ice storm in Richmond, I wanted to go out driving with friends. Dad was against the idea from the start stating that there were still icy patches on the road and it would be better to wait one more day before going out. I badgered dad endlessly. He eventually agreed let me go out, and also gave me a great opportunity to exercise good judgment by saying, "but don't go far from home". Needless to say, the evening ended with my car wedged on a rock, half-way down a ravine when I skidded off the road after hitting a patch of ice…many miles from home and well beyond the reaches of what could be considered even marginally good judgment.

In what has to be a testament to both my mom and dad’s love, faith, and persistence, miraculously all three of their sons have been of the house on their own for many years. We pay our own speeding tickets, fix our own dented cars, and try to instill the same foundations he laid for us in our kids. Dad’s role has evolved from disciplinarian, provider, and teacher into that of oracle and advisor. He is as logical and reasoned as ever. He is usually reading 2-3 books at the same time on a variety to topics from economics and history to calculus and HTML programming. He stays current on the trends of the world and the activities of his children and grandchildren. He gives advice when asked and love and support always. He has earned the privilege of being an advisor to his sons and while we don’t break his windows or wreck his cars anymore, we still keep him pretty busy. Thanks Dad! We love you! Happy Father's Day!

 

Yikes! My Day as a Lobbyist

While not exactly “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington” I had the opportunity to spend a day on Capitol Hill last week. One of our clients has a program that could see some of their funding reprogrammed given the current fiscal year and anticipated budget challenges. At first I was a little torn. Given my very clear leaning that our governments, federal, state, and local, all need to be put back in their box, I was a little conflicted about going up to The Hill to lobby for funding. However, after attending a detailed briefing and doing some independent research, it was pretty clear that this was a very well run program, smack-dab in the heart of the core function of government that should be funded this year and next. So last week, I spent the day meeting with representatives and senators on The Hill telling them the merits of this program. We usually met with the Chief of Staff and/or a staffer who was particularly familiar with our program, but we did meet 1 house member and 1 senator which was pretty cool. In all we had meetings with 6 House and 2 Senate offices.

Two things struck me about my day on The Hill. First everyone we met with, without exception was very bright, very personable, and very clearly had extremely busy days every day of the week. As I sat in our meetings and chatted with the staffers or elected officials I wondered…how did the country get into such a mess? How is it we are $ 15.6 trillion dollars in debt? It is certainly not due to a lack of talented and motivated people. They are abundant in Washington. So how is it we are in such a financial pickle? The only thing I can think of is that in starts and bursts over the past 80 years, the government has simply expanded its reach too far into the daily lives and local economies of the regular citizens. Federal programs followed the good intentions of elected officials, and over time money followed the programs…a lot of money. I suppose when there is a trough of cash, taxed, borrowed or otherwise, those with a vested interest in the money will work to protect those interests. The next thing we know we have a system that is out of control, that turns very bright people with tremendous ability and initiative into blathering mouthpieces enslaved by “the system”. I was particularly intrigued by one conversation with the chief of staff of a long time representative. I can’t imagine many folks who are smarter and more affable than this guy. However, as we were wrapping up our conversation, he started chatting about the change in the general demeanor of DC. He said that these “new folks” (which I am pretty sure meant Tea Party folks) don’t know how anything works up here. He said they won’t even talk to the other side of the isle about cutting deals to “get things done”. I am sure that the newbies in Washington are being obstinate partly for show for the people back home, but probably also because they believe in their positions and don’t want to cut deals. Cutting all these deals is how we got in this mess. The “way things are done” has delivered us to the precipice of financial ruin with out of control government spending. Maybe these “new folks” were on to something. While it won’t be pleasant, but maybe we need sequestration to take a meat cleaver to the federal budget and share the fiscal pain across the country. We have to get out of this mess somehow. It seems a shame and a waste that the talent working on The Hill seems to gets sucked into the system of how “things get done”…no matter how bad it makes things.

The second thing that struck me was how young everyone was. While it has to be great to have their enthusiasm and fresh ideas (until they get squashed by “how things get done”) I wondered if this preponderance of under 30 staffers was a good thing. If I was ever lucky enough to be a Senator or Congressman, the first thing I would do would be to hire a chief of staff who had the experience and gumption to tell me when I was full of bologna. I looked at these kids working on in these congressional offices and had to doubt whether any of them had the confidence, courage, or life experience to tell their boss when he or she was wrong. I firmly believe that any leader at any level needs someone on their staff with standing to tell them when they are full of shit. I heard a snippet from a commencement speech by Condie Rice in which she said if you find yourself surrounded by people who say “amen!” to everything you say or do, you probably need to start hanging around some different people. I think our representatives and senators need to think about adding a curmudgeon or two to their staffs – really smart, really crabby folks who speak their minds.

So we went to Washington, said our piece and went home. They day after we were there, I am sure there was another similar cadre to ours pleading their case for program funding just as passionately, but certainly not as eloquently, as we had the day before. I guess that’s just the way the system works…until someone breaks it or until it breaks itself under the weight of crushing debt. One of the two will happen. I hope it’s the former. I hope I didn’t contribute to the probability of the latter.

Dr. Mendez - Everyone's Friend

Manuel, Dad, Grampies, Doc…Dr Mendez was a man of many names. In the spirit of full disclosure, when he got on Mrs. Mendez bad side he was also called something that translated into polite English means equine derriere.

 Doc was not just a man of many names, he was also a man of many talents. Not long after I met Dr. Mendez, in a conversation in the Mendez den, he confirmed with me that it was his belief that he could in fact walk on water…he was certain, that if he just kept his feel moving fast enough he could skim along the top without going under. If anyone ever had to keep up with Dr. Mendez while he was walking in a hurry, it is not hard to take him at his word.

 But in fact Doc was a man of many talents:

 Surgeon: Dr Mendez spent many years in private practice and was without question a great help to all of his patients. After closing his private practice, Doc spent over ten years as Chief of the Medical staff at the State Penitentiary. In the years that preceded Dr. Mendez taking over the medical staff, the State Pen and the Commonwealth were regularly hit with malpractice law suits from inmates hoping to cash in on the treatment they had received because, well, they didn’t have anything to lose. When Dr Mendez ran the medical staff at the penitentiary, I am not aware of a single law suit from any of his patients. Why this change? Because Doc treated the inmates with respect, he listened to them, did everything he could to help them. He was their friend and they didn’t go after their friend.

 Doc’s role as a surgeon also gave him certain privileges. If you ever had dinner at his house, the fact that he was a surgeon meant that he did not have to wash his hands before serving sliced turkey, London broil, or roast beef to those at his table. I recall early in our dating tenure, when I was at the weekly Sunday dinner of Roast beef after church, Doc helped fix my plate by grabbing a couple of slices of beef and putting them on my plate. He said “Dun worry, I’m a suryon” I remember wondering how long ago it had been since he had been in surgery and did being a surgeon mean he was immune to germs?

Doc was a linguist. He spoke Spanish, English, French, Italian, and Portuguese. He taught foreign language adult education classes in Henrico County for several years. However, his greatest contribution as a linguist, at least in my household, are the phrases he coined that are part of our family lexicon…”lessesstop!” “Juegos de manos son de villanos” “We are having hamburgers and hagdogs” “Dun worry” and Cindy’s favorite… “Robbing Peter to pay Pan”

Artist: Doc was a talented artist. Each of his children’s homes house his artistic creations…paintings, drawings, sculptures, carvings, and stained glass displays are just a few of the works of art he left with us. He was his own artist however, he was never worried about whether he completed all his work and he never took requests. He has a half-finished portrait of Cindy from her elementary school picture that he is going to finish just as soon as he finds the time.

 Doc was a bit of a clown. No one can ever accuse Doc of taking life too seriously. For a few years Cindy and Leslie took Doc to physical therapy at St Mary’s where they ran him through the series of exercises, lifting weights and riding a stationary bike. A few times when neither Cindy or Leslie could take Doc to his physical therapy, I had to pinch hit. I am pretty sure Doc knew this was like having a substitute teacher in class. Doc never really liked physical therapy that much, but what he did like was going to lunch at “The Mexico” afterwards. When I took him to his PT, very early in the routine he would sit on the stationary bike and pretend “fall asleep” he pedaled a few seconds and fell asleep, peddled, slept. While he was “sleeping” ignoring any encouragement to finish his routine, I said – “hey Doc, let’s just skip the exercise and go get lunch”. He smiled, his eyes pooped open, he jumped off the bike and we scuttled out the door, much quicker than we had come in.

 Musician: Doc was a singer, drummer, and organist. He played the drums for his belly dancing troup for many years, playing at their practices and shows. He was the drummer for a band of doctors called…The Bed Pan Alley Gang. We had dinner with Doc one night at a Mexican restaurant that had a mariachi band. We made an off-the cuff suggestion that he should sing “Beseme Mucho” with band. Not long after that, Doc sang an entire set with the band, kicking off with “Besseme Mucho”. He played his organ in the dining room at home…and when he didn’t know all the words to the songs he sang while he played he made them up as he went along. His rendition of “Popeye that Sailorman” was a family favorite, though he never learned all the words. I can’t recite all the words to Popeye the Sailorman I know what aren’t the words…I am pretty sure that “I eat all my spinach, I don eat all my spinach” aren’t the correct lyrics.

 Doc fancied himself an interior designer. When he would come to visit his children’s houses he would rearrange full rooms of furniture, pictures, and knick-knacks. Often when he left we would spend an hour putting things back where they were, but not all the things, because he usually had some pretty good ideas.

 Above all else, Doc was a friend. He was everyone’s friend. When we used to go out with Doc whether it was for drinks when he was playing with one of his bands many years ago or just recently for breakfast at Westbury, if he didn’t know the wait staff and the people sitting around us when we sat down, he usually did by the time we left. He would stroll around introducing himself and all of us to his “new friends” He would talk about his six children and his 15 grandchildren. He would tell them stories about what Gordo was doing in Cleveland, about Danny’s business, about Chris’ band, and about Valerie, Leslie, and Cindy’s families. When Cindy and I were in the Henrico Doctor’s and St. Mary’s maternity wards starting our family, I swear half the staff knew Doc, and the half that didn’t, knew him well by the time we left. When asked about how he knew all these people and how he had all these friends he shrugged and said “people likes me”. He was right, people did “likes him”… and we will miss him. But the last couple of years weren’t kind to Doc and the great news for him now is that he is out of his chair, back on his feet, driving his car, dancing again while he sings “beseme mucho”. I have no doubt that he was welcomed warmly on Saturday by Tope &Topa, Melys & Rubencito, Sheryl, & Pino. I am heartened by the fact that when we all see him again someday he will be rearranging someone’s room, telling stories about his family to people he just met, and he will have a half-a-dozen art projects going…none of which will be finished.

Hedge Fund Managers Hate Obama?!? What's Up With That?

I read an interesting article in The New Republic about why hedge fund managers have turned on President Obama. The article opens with a 2007 story about a hedge fund manager meet-and-greet with candidate Obama in which he was asked what he would do with the tax rates of those in the room. Obama is said to have shot back quickly and decisively for all to absorb that he would raise them. The guys who play hardball for a living had thrown Obama a high and tight fastball and he had bounced a base hit up the middle. The report is that the hedge fund managers loved him. They loved that he came from the schools they attended, they loved that he was smart, they loved that he was a change from President Bush with whom they had all grown tired. To show their love for candidate Obama they gave and raised lots of money to convert candidate Obama to President Obama.

Now, however, he is roundly despised by the lords of Wall Street and the mega-rich hedge fund managers. The author goes into great detail trying to understand why this happened and how in 3 short years could fawning affection turn into visceral hate. It is a rather long article with lots of hand wringing and analysis looking into the transformation of relations with the hedge fund community. We are treated to a walk through the policy and public statements of President Obama as well as the psyche of the self made uber-rich hedge fund lord. None of which I believe hits the mark.

I think the hedge fund community has dumped Obama because they are achievers but more importantly they are people who deliver results. They get things done. They have a daily, monthly, and yearly scorecard on their success or failure. The strategies they deploy, the decisions they make, the people they hire...all have to succeed. You know why they hate Obama? Because none of the stuff that Obama has been touting to fix the ills of the economy, the national debt, or the health care mess will work...and to borrow some of the hedge fund manager's billingsgate, people who get things done don't have time for bullshit from people who don't. I don't think the hedge fund managers would be upset if Obama raised their taxes if it fixed the debt problem, but it won't. Given the social views of many of the hedge fund community, I doubt they have a problem with a big government health care solution, if it fixed the problem, but as everyone knows, Obamacare doesn't. I don't know that the hedge fund elites hate Obama, they just have no use for him, no time for him, and they hate bad investments.

I think the author could have cut to the chase by noting that these hedge fund managers are doers and achievers with very short attention spans and little patience for bullshit. When Obama become philosopher-in-chief, professor-in-chief, and patronizer-in-chief, these type-A achievers tossed him overboard, just like they would any bad investment...which he turned out to be. They now describe him in locker room language that the author interprets as disdain and hate. But again, I think that's just the way these achievers work to get things done. They don't do focus groups, they don't fill the air with trite platitudes intended to finesse. They get things done, they fix things when they are broken. Their investment in Obama was broken. Now it is fixed.

America That Doesn't Look Like Me

My work takes me to Northern Virginia a lot. Last week, while in NoVa, the calendar said March, but the weather outside said May, so I decided to go for a run after work. My hotel was situated in an area that has office buildings, hotels, as well as a plethora of new condos and apartment buildings. While NoVa has not been immune to the current economic doldrums, it has remained economically very healthy, especially in the technology, professional services, and government contracting business.

Anyway, I went for a run and saw lots of couples, singles, and families out enjoying the very un-March-like weather. If there is any doubt that the United States is still the land of opportunity, a stroll around Herndon will inspire you that there are people from all over the world coming to the United States to find their slice of the American Dream. While out for my run, I would guess that I saw 100+ people out enjoying the weather. I heard many dialects that I did not recognize. I saw people that looked to be from Latin, African, Middle Eastern, and Asian decent. I would guess that I saw less than 10 people that "looked like me". It was inspiring to see this world-mix of people living their dreams, enjoying what our great land has to offer. My bet is these folks are driven, risk takers, and achievers. All good.

Things came unglued for me when I saw a dad playing with his son, speaking in their native tongue, which I did not understand. The dad looked pretty athletic but threw a football like he had probably spent a lot more time kicking a soccer ball. The son was enthusiastic about learning to throw and catch. So what was the problem? Both were prominently sporting Washington Redskins gear. What's up with that? There are long suffering native residents of NoVa that kind of have to be Redskins fans. They grew up going to RFK watching Sonny Jurgenson, Billy Kilmer, Leroy Brown, Charlie Taylor, Art Monk,and Chris Hamburger. Those folks really don't have any choice. They are locked-in Redskins. No matter how futile the Redskins' efforts to regain lost glory, they are died-in-the wool fans and are essentially trapped.

I considered stopping to chat with this dad and his son. I wanted to make sure they knew that they were free agents, that just because they lived here, they didn't have to be Redskins fans. I wanted to make sure they knew about Daniel Snyder, Steve Spurrier, Gus Ferotte, Albert Hainesworth, etc. I wanted to ask if they knew about the Baltimore Ravens who played only 30 minutes farther away than the Redskins and have much better parking in addition to a much better team. I wanted to make sure they knew they could jump on any bandwagon they wanted. New England Patriots, New York Giants, San Francisco 49ers to name a few, all offered far more satisfying NFL experiences than the Redskins. I hated to see the life they were building in America sullied by becoming Redskins fans. I felt obligated to help, but then realized that this was yet another great example of why our country is a great place to live, work, and raise a family. In the United States, you are free to make all the nonsensical decisions you want. Even choosing to be a Redskins fan. Good luck with that decision, but don't come crying to me when at your retirement party you make a comment like "I never thought I would be retiring from 30 years of service without seeing the Redskins in a playoff game." There are somethings you can take to the bank. America is the land of opportunity for the willing, and the Redskins are a prime example of what happens when bad leadership meets poor execution.

Republicans...The Chicago Cubs of Politics?

Before the resurrection on the Boston Redsox as a baseball A-list franchise, the Chicago Cubs and the Boston Redsox were the hallmarks of baseball futility. Both franchises were cursed, the Redsox by The Bambino, the Cubs by a goat. The Redsox broke the curse of The Bambino winning not one but two world series championships. The Cubs meanwhile continue perfecting the art of the futile. The late, great Chicago columnist Mike Royko made the obscure theory of the “Ex Cub Factor” famous in 1990 when he proclaimed that the dynastic Oakland A’s of the late 1980’s and early 1990’s would lose the world series to the over-matched and middling Cincinnati Reds.

For those not familiar with the Ex-Cub Factor, the curse works like this - any baseball team that makes the world series with 3 or more ex-Cubs on their roster will lose the world series. Since 1946 this has held true for 13 of 14 world series teams with 3 or more ex-cubs on their world series roster. Only the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1960, on a fluke homerun by light hitting second baseman Bill Mazeroski bested the Ex Cub factor. However, in the only series to defy the Ex Cub Factor, the winning Pirates were outscored by the Yankees 55-27 over the seven game stand. Even when bested, The Ex Cub Factor gets in its shots.

In 1990 the country yawned in anticipation of the coming world series which was nothing more than a coronation of the Oakland A’s who made a laughing stock of the San Francisco Giants in the 1989 series, beating them convincingly four games to zero. However, late in the season, the A’s added their 3rd ex-Cub to their roster, seemingly daring the the Ex Cub Factor to show itself. Only long suffering Cub fan Mike Royko spotted this critical roster gaffe by the A’s and predicted certain victory for the Cincinnati Reds. Not only did the Reds win the world series, but in a defiant show of force, the Ex Cub Factor made a mockery of the 1990 series and the Red won in a route, four games to none.

I think the republicans might have their own curse, maybe it’s the “retread candidate curse”, but watching the GOP presidential circus is making me think they are starting to resemble the 1990 Oakland A’s. I don’t think that in modern times there has been a more vulnerable sitting president than President Obama. His polling numbers are beyond awful. His disapproval ratings are higher than his approval ratings. 70% of the country feels the country is headed in the wrong direction. Even his personal likability numbers are hitting new lows. The economic recovery that should have been has been muted by his over bearing tax and regulatory policies. Unemployment is so bad that unemployment numbers only go down when the number of people who quit looking for work goes up. The CBO has rescored his healthcare plan and published what everyone with half a brain already knew, that healthcare costs and the deficit will go up not down when Obamacare becomes the law of the land. Obama spiked an oil pipeline that would bring more North American oil to the United States and produce thousands of private sector jobs to appease his environmental base…and so on and so on….Obama makes Jimmy Carter look like a reasonable successful president.

However, given the republican field, when most anyone outside of a circus clown could beat president Obama in November, I would bet you $ 100 right now, that the republicans are going to nominate one of a only handful of people living today who cannot win in November. Newt Gingrich? Really? Six months ago, I suspect that the Obama’s were lamenting their last Christmas in the White House and how much they were going to miss vacationing around the world on the taxpayer’s dime. I imagine today they are measuring for new drapes and looking forward to hosting sweet 16 birthday parties in the White House for the First Daughters.

Maybe I have this wrong. Maybe the republicans really aren’t the political versions of the Chicago Cubs. Maybe they aren’t cursed by an Ex Cub factor or a Retread Candidate Curse. However, no one, and I mean no one outside the state of Ohio thought the Reds could beat the A’s in 1990. While the 2012 presidential election is there for the taking in 2012, on a silver platter, if Newt is the nominee, I suspect the republicans will give it back.

Marvelous Marv Throneberry was one of the worst fielding first basemen in baseball history on one of the worst teams in baseball history, the 1962 New York Mets. A story is told that after a game in which he committed his usual 2 errors, the last of which, a dropped routine popup, cost the Mets the game, there was a birthday celebration in the clubhouse for one of the Mets players. Each player had a piece of cake with the exception of Marvelous Marv. Legend has it that Throneberry complained aloud that everyone had cake and he had none. Marv’s legendary manager Casey Stengel looked at Marv and blurted out for the entire clubhouse to hear “We was gonna give you a piece of cake, but we was afraid you was gonna drop it!”

Why does this story make me think of the republicans? Why does the Ex Cub Factor make me nervous? Maybe I am just missing baseball season. Maybe I am overly pessimistic. However, I just have a strong feeling that the republicans are expecting to get a piece of cake this November…but I think they are gonna drop it.

Summer of Love Part II? Maybe Not

I was 5 years old during the Summer of Love. I didn't know it was the summer of love. For me, 1967 was the summer of learning how to ride a two-wheel bike and catch a baseball. I didn't know where San Francisco was or that there was a war in Vietnam. I always felt like I kind of missed out on something, by being around during the Summer of Love, but too little to have any idea of what was going on.

This might be part of the reason why The Occupiers have been so interesting to me. While they are literally a poor-man's version of the hippie revolution of 1967, I guess they are the closest thing we have today to counter-culture. I thought maybe the Occupy Movement had enough cachet, enough backbone, and enough conviction to become relevant and recreate some of the social awareness of the Summer of Love. I am a big enough person to admit when I am wrong. I wouldn't insult the Summer of Love by comparing the Occupy movement with it.

There is no more trite cliche than "you can never go back home"...I guess it could be extended to say you can never go back to 1967 either...no matter how filthy you look or how badly you smell. I was in Boston on business a few weeks ago and made it a point to visit "Occupy Boston". What a letdown. Occupy Boston was essentially city of tents that should have been put in the dumpster back in 1967. I don't know if Philip Morris is the official sponsor of the Occupy movement, but when I went to visit it was mostly a bunch of folks who needed a shower standing around bumming smokes from each other. Maybe they were on a break or something, but there wasn't a lot of protesting going on. No chants, no drums, no human microphone speeches. The only activity was a couple of occupiers making a sign letting people know that they needed donations of blankets, coats, socks, men's & women's underwear. I noticed they left soap off the list. I thought about asking if they forgot about toiletries in general, but I was wearing a suit and tie that day and presumed that they probably weren't that interested in hearing my suggestions. They probably should have added cigarettes to the list too, because they looked like they were running low, but again, I didn't want to seem like a butt-insky. In addition to the signs asking for donations of things they needed, there were lots of other signs making ridiculous statements or suggestions like "People before profits" "no electoral college" "tax the greedy, feed the needy" "We have jobs, we need revolution" They have jobs? really? I didn't know camping out in Boston was a job. A little solid advice for them...if they want to keep that job they better quit hanging around smoking cigarettes and get back to work. There were some clearly self-serving signs like "Outlaw Student Debt"...I wonder who wrote that one.

I was really disappointed in the occupiers I saw. Maybe, like the Redsox of old, the Boston Occupiers are just lousy occupiers...the cellar dwellers of the occupy movement. However, I also spent a fair amount of time on the OWS website reading and chatting with occupiers on their forum. Again, major disappointment. Rational ideas and realistic solutions are absent from the OWS debate, pushed aside by calls for a ban on currency and a return to essentially a barter economy. Really? Barter economy? That's how we are going to get out of the nation's financial mess?

Whether they know it or not, the occupiers have some legitimate gripes. The government is out of control. The cozy relationships between Wall Street and Washington are an abomination of our treasured capitalist system. Crony capitalism looks after the fat cats often to the detriment of those trying to work their way up the ladder. What is their solution? Asking for handouts, demanding that debt be illegal, and accusing George Bush of planning 9/11 are not solutions. They are lunacy. Also, camping on private or municipal property making a nuisance of oneself is no way to make an impact on society. I know the occupiers hate leadership and any sense of authority through a hierarchy, but if they want anyone to take them seriously, they need leadership, they need a message, and they need an agenda. Absent any of these they are just smelly loiterers who are running low on smokes. I doubt there are many five year old kids today who are going to look back and feel like they missed something because they were too young to be an occupier.